Tuesday, September 13, 2011

Post-NFL Week 1 Predictions

Predictions made about the previous week’s NFL action based on the results of those games.

Week 1

Kyle Orton will do enough to keep his starting job with Denver, but not enough to quiet the people who would rather see his high-profile backup taking the snaps.

I’m referring, of course, to Brady Quinn.

Cam Newton will show people why he was the Heisman Trophy winner and the No. 1 overall pick. He will also remind people that he is still a rookie.

No matter who wins the Jets-Cowboys game, the winning team’s fans will read too much into the victory and the losing team’s fans will not read enough into the loss.

Tony Romo will again prove that he is not, as of yet, an elite quarterback.

The anti-Eli Manning calls will get a wee bit louder.

Since the NFL instituted the Thursday Night Season Opener in 2002, only twice have both teams in the contest reached the playoffs (2002 and 2004). On three occasions neither squad made the playoffs (2003, 2006 and 2009). Four times saw just one team reach the playoffs. Last season the Vikings fell to New Orleans in the Thursday Night Season Opener and finished 6-10. This year’s Thursday Night Season Opener will be close; the loser will not reach the playoffs.

Thursday Night Openers
2010: NO 14 – Min 9 (NO made playoffs)
2009: Pit 13 – Ten 10 (neither made playoffs)
2008: NYG 16 – Was 7 (NYG made playoffs)
2007: Ind 41 – NO 10 (Ind made playoffs)
2006: Pit 28 – Mia 17 (neither made playoffs)
2005: NE 30 – Oak 20 (NE made playoffs)
2004: NE 27 – Ind 24 (both made playoffs)
2003: Was 16 – NYJ 13 (neither made playoffs)
2002: SF 16 – NYG 13 (both made playoffs)

The Bears will remind people that they, in fact, won the NFC North last season, and it is theirs until it is taken from their cold, dead hands.

The Detroit Lions will defeat Tampa Bay in the battle of: team that will come close to a playoff berth but ultimately fall short (previously known as the Houston Texans).

The Texans are in more of a desperation mode than the Peyton-less Colts. Their game against Indianapolis is a must-win game for Houston, which will rise to the occasion to keep Coach Kubiak off the hot seat, at least for now.

Cleveland and Cincinnati will still play their game, even though nobody outside of Ohio cares.

Michael Vick and the Eagles won’t be perfect but they will beat the Rams. St. Louis will show that it’s not quite ready to play with the big boys.

Jim Harbaugh will again lead an upset over Pete Carroll’s team. Ted Ginn Jr. will electrify with his return abilities. Ted Ginn Jr. won’t see the light of day as a wide receiver.

Baltimore will open up its offense against Pittsburgh. The game will feature an NFL-record 20 first-quarter fights.

Tom Brady and the Patriots will do most of their damage against the Dolphins through the air, with enough running to keep Miami’s defense honest. But the Patriots’ defense will make Chad Henne look like a Pro Bowl quarterback to the point where during Broncos-Raiders, Denver fans will start chanting Henne’s name.

The Chiefs will provide evidence that last season was a one-hit wonder.

The Raiders will continue to be dysfunctional, undisciplined, wild and kind of fun to watch. They are the guilty pleasure of the NFL.

Donovan McNabb will make Minnesota fans miss the days of Tavaris Jackson.

Tavaris Jackson will make Seattle fans miss the days of Matt Hasselbeck

Matt Hasselbeck will make Tennessee fans miss the days of Kerry Collins.

Kerry Collins will, well, you know.

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