Wednesday, January 9, 2013

Post-NFL Wildcard Predictions: Episode &%#@

Game-by-game predictions made prior to the NFL Wildcard Weekend based on the results of those games

Three rookies will enter the weekend trying to advance to the Divisional round. Only one will move on.

There can be only one, third rounder.

The Seahawks and Redskins will prove that football is indeed a game of runs, as Washington will open with a 14-0 run and Seattle will close with a 24-0 run.

Advantage, Seahawks.

After the game, no one will be talking about Seattle's defense, or Russell Wilson, or even Skittles. No, the focus will be on RGIII's knee, and whether or not he kneeded to be playing.

Too easy? Yeah, you're probably right.

The story will become a he said-he said-he said between Mike Shanahan, RGIII and team doctor James Andrews. Except the story won't focus on the injury RGIII suffered during Seahawks' game. It will be about the injury he sustained against the Ravens. On Dec. 9. And whether or not Andrews gave RGIII the ok to get back in the game after he hit his knee against the Ravens' Haloti Ngata late in the fourth.

Seattle's Chris Clemons will be like, "I suffered an ACL injury against the Redskins. Four days ago. What's a guy gotta do to get noticed around here?!"

Wilson will throw a "block" on the game-clinching touchdown run by Marshawn Lynch, proving once and for all that quarterbacks under six feet can still "block."

Interestingly enough, the majority of NFL fans would like to see the two wildcards in the NFC Championship (Seattle-Green Bay) but the top two seeds in the AFC Championship (New England-Denver).

The week of football will feature a pair of shoves: first Washington offensive lineman Trent Williams on Seahawks cornerback Richard Sherman (after the game), then Alabama center Barrett Jones on Alabama quarterback A.J. McCarron (during the national championship against Notre Dame).

That hit on McCarron will be the most pressure he will see all night.


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